When working with the Sexuality is it important to understand that strong sexual energy flow, functions at its best when all of our "Being" is in stasis. "Being" refers to all of the bodies that make up who we are. Namely the physical body, emotional, etheric, spiritual and mental body.
You may have strong sexual energy when you are younger, but if it is solely connected to a mind that purely seeks to serve itself through gratification ; as time progresses, the sexual energy which is not connected to the body, nor the heart, but purely stimulated through the mind, will eventually shut down and this is when dysfunction kicks in.
Similarly if there are painful emotional beliefs around one's sexuality based on past traumas, this may affect your physical body and it's ability to allow the sexual energy to flow. Our hormones may fall out of balance as a result, especially if we are living unhealthy lifestyles. These 'bodies" are all interconnected and when I work with you we explore all those arenas that makes up your sexuality.
Four components that support the PHYSICAL BODY!
Take good care of your body: Taking good care of your body through exercise and diet ensures good blood flow. As we age, unhealthy diet, smoking and lack of exercise creates inflammation and causes atherosclerosis (arteries narrowed by plaque) which causes a decrease in the blood flow. This is bad for erections and vaginal lubrication. It is important to follow a healthy daily regime that ensures that our blood sugar, cholesterol and blood pressure remain low and that our lymphatic system is clean.
Increase Nitric Oxide: Nitric Oxide is the main chemical messenger that tells your blood vessels to open and ensure blood flow. As you age, you lose the ability to produce Nitric Oxide made by the cells that lie in your blood vessels . This is due to atherosclerosis, making it harder for your cells to produce it, which in turn impairs blood flow. Viagra helps keep Nitric Oxide around for longer, but is not the cure. The solution is to eat foods high in Nitric Oxide such as leafy greens, beets and pomegranates and to maintain a healthy exercise routine. Something as simple as daily Tabatha and the Nitric Oxide Dump exercise, which asks for 10 minutes from your life, can change your health around completely if maintained. Included in this are supplements with L-arginine, L-citrinine and anti-oxidants that can help keep your levels high.
Hormone optimisation: Testosterone, oestrogen and progesterone have the potential to drop as we age, depending on how it is that we live in our world. These hormones are essential for maintaining Libido. Men with chronically low testosterone lose interest in sex along with the ability to maintain an erection. While this may appear to be purely a physiological response; emotional, spiritual and mental factors play a huge role in pushing the hormones out of stasis as all the "bodies" are interconnected. I know healthy 60 year old men who maintain the strong erections that they had when they were 16. For woman, Testosterone and progesterone have the potential to start dropping in their late 30's and after menopause the oestrogen plummets which equals zero sex drive. Once again this does not have to be the case. I know many powerful woman post menopause who deeply enjoy their sex lives and partners. This all takes work. It requires healing, healthy lifestyles and regular practice.
4. Semen retention: Semen retention is when you avoid ejaculation. So much life force energy/Jing is lost every time you ejaculate, and the "retaining of the semen" allows you to preserve this life force. This practice is one of the foundational tenets of Taoist sexual practice and very much incorporated into Tantric love making.
Semen retention takes time and practice. It can be hard to control your body, especially as a lifetime of having sex a certain way has conditioned you against it. However, those that have mastered it are quick to point out its benefits.
The process of learning to control your body involves coming into presence and fully body awareness. This process develops a deep intimacy with self and also with your partner. It requires a deep tuning in and this requires a clear mind.
Retaining semen improves levels of testosterone in men, which means that more muscle mass can be gained. Testosterone is also responsible for increasing Nitric Oxide synthesis.
The mood boost from love making is attributed to the state of being aroused which contributes to increased levels of oxytocin and dopamine. When we are making love for a long time involving many full body orgasms, whilst refraining from ejaculation, you amplify your Oxytocin and Dopamine levels
Stamina in lovemaking is important. Men learn to orgasm without ejaculating will stay erect for longer. Even if you finish, but your partner hasn’t, you can continue to enjoy the journey, whilst satisfying their needs.
Initially it may seem like you are denying your ability to orgasm. However over time and practice you get to experience a full body orgams which is so much more powerful than we we term a ejaculatory "sneeze''. This means that you can continue making love over and over again as you will still be erect. If your partner has the capacity to keep going, there is a good chance that you will get to experience many full body orgasms..
During session we explore all of the "bodies". How healthy is your mind and your emotions in response to your sexuality. How deep is your connection to your partner and how comfortable are you with intimacy. How connected are you to your spirituality and inner cosmos. How aware are you as an energetic being, connected to heart and spirit beyond just the physical body and/or the mind. And lastly how healthy is your physical body and its ability to function at its optimum?